smooching theodore callahan

Recently read a book that joyfully reminded me of misspent moments of doodling my hybridded married name over and over again as the 'groom' sat two rows over in Geometry class, clueless of my existence. I was very excited to have met her this past New Years and over grill cheeses, I knew I wanted to spend a bunch of time chatting and cocktailing with this lady.  When I learned she was a writer and started reading her wares, I was certain she was a rock star. She nails it cleanly, entertainingly and with joyful words. Go. Read it now. I said Now.

On the Twitters, I think the tweet that she tweeted was about misunderstanding a writers work...

"I thought your book was about Theodore Callahan, the great 18th century industrialist and his romantic adventures across Euriasia

Born in the shires of Scotland, he was wooed to France at the age of 15 by the rich widow of M. Gaston de Levinduveau, inventor of the macaroon.

Once in France, he discovered the worlds of science, art and love making. His genius brought about a sexual industrial renaissance and created the progenitor of our modern vibrators"

Thanks for the inspiration, chica ;)

leisure lush murder

Part of me feels like this is about White Russians and the topic of discussion: jetting to Aruba for MaiTais and cabana boys.

"Zip it, Emily! Word on the street is Frank's company is going public, so it's cabana boys for all!"

"Come on, Gerti..."

"Well, what about Harold?"

"Tell'em it's LadyTime and he'll stay in the city for a week. Pack your bags, Gert"

Thus began the adventures of Emily, Mable and Gerti: Moxy Braods? Ladies of Leisure, Lush and Murder.

Mean while, the fella are in 'meeting'

"Harold, where ARE my sock garters?"

"Around the neck of that hooker, Hank"


Automatic Voice: If your mortgage is currently behind or you have an interest rate of 7 percent or higher, please press 1 for an opportunity to lower your payments--
M: (presses 1)
Person: Hi this is (name) do you need help with your mortgage?
M: nope
P: don't?
M: nope
P: why did you press one?
M: I'm bored
P: I don't understand....
M: what is there to understand, the world is a vast and ever evolving place. Accept that and you accept peace and our lord Jesus.