For the love of all that is good and holy....

For the love of all that is good and holy, before you come to me with a request, with a need, with a question, you need to travel somewhere - all of which you've done 37 times in the last hour

READ YOUR DAMN EMAILS
ANSWER YOUR DAMN PHONES
MAKE UP YOUR DAMN MINDS

I've researched, I've called, I've analyzed, I've dug, I've printed out and collated.
If you take the time and effort to use your skills (highly educated or not) to swiftly and promptly remove your cranium and all content there within from the other opening in you body (colloquially known as your ass) you will see the answers are there, the needs have been met

If I don't have the answer - I will tell you "I don't know"
If I need more detail - I will ask "May I Have more details?"

BUT you don't know what you want, don't spend what precious little time we have on this earth persickificating over flights and times. Hemming and Hawing over when you want to leave and from where you want to leave and what's cheapest.... CHRIST ALMIGHTY give me strength.

Inspired by Introspectre, I've written a haiku

Patience is a friend
A guest I welcome with love
Unless you're an ass


Patience is a gift
Given to everyone with joy
Unless you're an ass

Swimming pool in winter
Confidence in a white house
My patience for you

Ass Ass Ass Ass Ass
five times thrityfive thousand
You You You You You